you got penged!

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20060314

the adventure of Khengis Gan

remember Khengis Gan? the mongolian who ruthlessly swept across the earth plundering and attacking helpless towns? well, this is one of the many stories that have been told about his wonderful (though many may think otherwise) exploits.

one day Khengis Gan was riding across the plains of the great Mongolia, wearing his trusty plastic jacket in the heat of the sun. he was obviously sweating, but being civilised as he was and wanting to have a clear distinction between himself and his followers, who were clad in nothing more than white fur coats, he refused to take it off.

"master," one of them said. "are you not afraid of the dying-because-the-body-has-a-lack-of-water-which-is-needed-to-sustain-survival? (dehydration where go invented yet stoopid)"

"no, you gorilla. i am Khengis Gan and the sun shall bow to me before i take off my coat." and with a slash of his claws he brought the man down from his horse and jumped apon him, tearing out his lungs before sucking his blood. (yucks!)

as they rode on and on, Khengis Gan began to feel the heat of the sun and his refusal to take off his coat take a toll on him, and he began to grow white in the face.

"master," another foolish one said. "are you not afraid of the dying-because-the-body-has-a-lack-of-water-which-is-needed-to-sustain-survival?"

"no you cb." and he killed him.

after riding for awhile longer, an eclipse occured.

"see the sun has bowed to me!" Khengis Gan declared, and removed his coat and clipped it onto his horse.

"because i have used the clips to clip my coat to my horse, this natural occurence shall be called the e-clipse of the sun!"

"but why the extra e, master?" one of the followers asked.

"because i am an extra kia who likes to do it if you have a problem then you die!" and he killed him.

and that is how the eclipse came about yay!

(did you notice the effect of too much homework?)

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since 180106

20060314

the adventure of Khengis Gan

remember Khengis Gan? the mongolian who ruthlessly swept across the earth plundering and attacking helpless towns? well, this is one of the many stories that have been told about his wonderful (though many may think otherwise) exploits.

one day Khengis Gan was riding across the plains of the great Mongolia, wearing his trusty plastic jacket in the heat of the sun. he was obviously sweating, but being civilised as he was and wanting to have a clear distinction between himself and his followers, who were clad in nothing more than white fur coats, he refused to take it off.

"master," one of them said. "are you not afraid of the dying-because-the-body-has-a-lack-of-water-which-is-needed-to-sustain-survival? (dehydration where go invented yet stoopid)"

"no, you gorilla. i am Khengis Gan and the sun shall bow to me before i take off my coat." and with a slash of his claws he brought the man down from his horse and jumped apon him, tearing out his lungs before sucking his blood. (yucks!)

as they rode on and on, Khengis Gan began to feel the heat of the sun and his refusal to take off his coat take a toll on him, and he began to grow white in the face.

"master," another foolish one said. "are you not afraid of the dying-because-the-body-has-a-lack-of-water-which-is-needed-to-sustain-survival?"

"no you cb." and he killed him.

after riding for awhile longer, an eclipse occured.

"see the sun has bowed to me!" Khengis Gan declared, and removed his coat and clipped it onto his horse.

"because i have used the clips to clip my coat to my horse, this natural occurence shall be called the e-clipse of the sun!"

"but why the extra e, master?" one of the followers asked.

"because i am an extra kia who likes to do it if you have a problem then you die!" and he killed him.

and that is how the eclipse came about yay!

(did you notice the effect of too much homework?)

i think, it is time for all to know the truth. the truth about pengopolis and its founders. (by the way, i suggest you read the about section for our names first. :D

it was a sunny afternoon. sir jeremy raffles, the pirate who got knighted when he gave the government 1 billion bucks for a ship worth 1 million, was sailing on that 1 million buck ship. the ship was manufactured in a factory by the notorious moses tan ah tek, whos so fat that anyone can carry him with one hand. of course, moses is just the useless fat skinny person whos a figurhead - his brother noah was the one who constructed it. moses had become lazy and had not practiced his skills, so when he wanted to part the straits of pengolin for us to reach pengopolis, he failed horribly and a shark flew at him, biting a huge chunk of his non existent flesh. ...
sorry i went off track. ok anyway, jeremy was aboard the ship, with his first mates apul and slau. he was using his special stainless steel carvin knife to cut up small pieces of cake to feed his blue water pokemon merrill. merrill was so happy he kept saying "merrill merrill". (a recording of this will be made available soon). so anyway, just as jeremy was about to feed his short little pokemon, tom, dick and harry, who were doing chin ups and showing off their pecs at the top of the mask, shouted, "LAND JAHOOY! LAND JAHOOY!"

WOOTWOOT! the ship landed on the clean white shores of some funky island which was full of big birds (daniels). Bentay the bouncer bounced onto the beach and after surveying the area with four knives in one hand, and a scissors blade in another, and said, "all clear! WILL you come down, sir?" Jeremy sed, "imma pirate, the knight thing is just corruption! gay officials. dun call me that. im anti-corruption ok"
anyway, it was lunch time already. jeremy's stomach was growling and even the strongest of tedric diggory's spells could not ease the damn gastric. as you all know : DING dong bell, PUSSY in the well. dingcat jumped into the sea and using his PURRPECT paws grabbed a prawn. jeremy the hungry pirate gobbled it up within one second.

heheh not hungry anymore. they strolled into the island, with bentay on a constant lookout. Bentay sed, "crap, i see SIMBA" Dingcat suddenly stood up and sed "if i'm not faster than that pirated cat, dont CALL ME DING." he strutted over to simba, flexing his pao-shaped calves. "wanna battle? j(g)otham racing style ok. i own in x-box. first to go to the sea and come back wins." of course, simba was humble and said "ok but i surely lose" anyway, they started, and 5 seconds later, simba was back. 15 minutes later, dingcat crawled back. dingcat said "its ok, you can still call me ding. i wont mind" ok so we shall call him ding from now on, even though there is a 99.99999% chance we wont be seeing him anymore.
simba led them to the pride rock and showed them the vast brown sea surrounding the island. "yuck! it looks like shiat!" mr pussycat said. (sorry, but there was still that 0.00001% chance) jeremy cuffed the cat and asked his trusted aide superman to fly to one of the islands and fly back. after a while, superman came back and reported, "theres this super nice place, but the only problem is that its teeming wif penguins and jackguins." jeremy said "nvm! lets get that place. i wanna be king, baby"

we ran all the way to our ship and started sailing for that island. suddenly, there was this great storm and the waves were as tall as seetow + tom. HOW. the crew tried throwing all the heavy stuffs off, but to no avail. even the throwing off of fat nat wasn't really helpful. at their wits' end, gan the librarian immediately put on his thinking jacket, and took a book from his massive collection of books. then, he summoned saint edmund. suddenly, ah hiok screamed. everyone was going to throw him abroad coz they thought he gone woozles when he suddenly said in a deep voice, " i am channeling the spirit of saint edmund. according to my boss, you have to throw kevinlim and his guitar, and the one who summoned me into the water then you will be okay." kevin was sporty enough to suicide, but not the librarian. too bad even though he learnt everything in theory from books, he could not apply houdini's trick of escaping from his wet jackect, and sunk into titanic which was 8000 feet below. suddenly the sky cleared and the ship skimmed like a kayak to the island of peng/jackguins. and this is the story of the founding of PENGOPOLIS.

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