remember how two weeks ago i predicted an arsenal victory and it really did happen? well, here i am again with my top tips for the top games going on in the UEFA Champions League! woohoo! hail me the mysterious punter they should like feature me under a special column in the New Paper called like Slau's Sanctum or something...
OK anyway back to the point:
ARSENAL carry a one-goal lead back to highbury against REAL MADRID. ok keep in mind that this is an AWAY GOAL, so real have to win by TWO to win. draw, and they're out, simple as that.
arsenal's home form had been solid this year, solid as in SOLID AS A ROCK! and they're going to (high) BURY real under a torrent of amazing attacking prowess when they clash in a condemned match that arsenal is going to take by the scruff of the neck and OWN it.
another thing, ronaldo has been real's lucky charm. seriously, why hasnt he been scoring? the reason is simple yet seemingly idiotic: he obviously isnt wagging his index finger when he scores!
in football there is a god called the Footy Father, who looks down upon all those skilful and dedicated to the beautiful game.
(ok SCREW IT i dun have so much time to upload and look at blogger screw itself up)
anyway if you dun celebrate the way the Footy Father has decreed you to, then you dun score simple as that. which is why ronaldo cant score.
and why isnt the rest of the team of real performing? simple! they're all androids!
why do you think perez resigned? cos he was an android! and the real manager, going only by the code name Esoj Ohniruom, decided to destroy him cos he was malfunctioning :D simply believable innit?
and the next game, CHELSEA take on BARCELONA in a clash at the nou camp where barca take a one goal lead back to their home ground.
alright analysing the situation barca are in a better situation that arsenal because even if they lose by one goal they will go thru on away goals since they have two from the game at stamford bridge.
and based on the tykoness of barca (they won 3-2 at deportivo) and the laclustreness of chelsea (2-1 winners only against west brom anyone?) anyone would be predicting a barca win.
any why not? to tell you the truth my friend met the second cousin twice removed of frank lampard and he told my friend that frank really isnt injured, but he just wants to give the match a miss cos if he gets kicked out of his second straight champs league he's going to cry all the way to his mommy.
and he has this fear, especially after the sven goran eriksson and the fake sheik incident, that his mommy is actually a fake mommy too! yah so lampard is out, morale is low, and how can u trust maniche when he says morale is high. he hasnt even played a bloogy champs league match!
so arsenal and barca to go thru to the next round.
anyway, other results:
juventus to beat werder bremen 2-0 at home and go thru
liverpool to beat benfica 1-0, qualify on penalties.
and thats basically all i can remember off hand. distrust me at your own peril MWAHAHAH!