holidays? what holidays?

ok, since we have so much homework to do today, i suggest some pre-homework meditation today. ok fine i guess that won't help very much, and so i shall suggest some reasons to get past these assignments. and trust me, these will TOTALLY convince your teacher.

forget about the reasons like competitions. those are under another section where you have to create false circumstances to substantiate your claim. the reasons i am about to propose are totally fool proof, and cannot be proven wrong.

1) my mom hates me doing homework! (moms will generally side their children, and scold them after the teacher is gone. if shes not then too bad for you haha.)
2) my dad hates me doing homework! (same thing)
3) my dog ate my worksheets and died and we threw him into the atlantic ocean. (make sure you include the last part so the teacher cant check up on it, and pretend to cry too! den she'll send you to the counsellor to slack!)
4) it got too wet! (singapore's humid, the water condenses on your worksheet. helps if you use this on a non-science teacher.)
5) superman stole it. (double negative. superman isnt real, superman isnt bad. the false cancels out haha! its true!)
6) i gave it to the rep! (sabo him/her. and keep insisting that you did so the teacher will give up somemore time cos she/he got nothing else he/she can do.)
7) it melted! (singapore's hot.)
8) you were watching soccer! (implying that he/she had no time to mark your worksheets, so you had no time to do yours either.)
9) go to hell lah. (if they're in hell, they cant collect your wrksheets right?)
and
10) i didnt bring it. (totally believable, and much better than the previous nine!)

im not really very into debates, but yichao made me rmbr this particular motion that ri had to propose or oppose i cant rmbr some time back, and it was (wtf) that teletubbies were better than powerpuff girls...lol...

anyway ive decided to try my hand at it, especially since i watch enough tv to noe at least the basics abt these two groups of characters. and so, here would be my speech for the debate:














(oh did i mention that ziyao did something on why superman would defeat batman in a fight last year? haha i should try that one sometime)

ok, fine, i suppose that the motion meant that teletubbies would defeat the powerpuff girls in a fight, but i unfortunately think that they would in fact get owned by the powerpuff girls. why? three reasons:

they're cuter than the powerpuff girls
they have televisions in their stomachs
they are plain stoopid

ok so what does cuteness have to do with this? everything, in fact. you look at jorel, he's so cute (that's why he has 5 girlfriends) and he cant fight! den u look at peng...he's even cuter cos of his big head, and he also cant fight! den u look at ding...yucks...not cute...but can fight sia.

so obviously when x=cuteness, y=cannot fight for nuts.

also teletubbies have televisions in their stomachs, so how can u expect them to fight? i mean it would be like peng fighting ding at full speed lah wth. powerpuff girls can sit and watch them lumber around trying to their like furry little paws with no claws (hey rhymes!) around their throats and what, strangle them? PLS this is children entertainment!

and are u trying to say that the teletubbies are good enough to beat the PPG when even mojo jojo cant do it? PSHAW!

and i rmbr watching this teletubby episode (YES ok i did watch it sometimes) when tinky winky went chasing lala all over the place just cos she stole his purple watever it was...

wah lau...seriously lah hasnt he heard of stealing her ball and going for a trade? LOL and the constant staring at the baby sun wouldnt have done anything good for their eyes as well, so i bet they wouldnt see the powerpuff girls for miles until they're right in front of their faces and just nicely poised to smach their heads off.

ok! thats all byebye!

ok, so here's another club that takes care of the enjoyment of students in raffles institution, and its called the IRHC (Immediate Relief and Help Club).

so what does the IRHC do? some of you might equate immediate relief with first aid and bandages, and breathing into other peoples' mouths, but in this case this is NOT what we mean!

so what do we mean by immediate relief? well, in class we require a lot more than listening to lessons and copying stuff from the board and saboing classmates (although that would be more fun than the other two).

sometimes what we need is just a little time to ourselves to whip out our handphones, play a few games, and throw one or two knives to relieve the stress of having to suffer the anomosity of trick questions, wrong sf specifications, and unanswerable answers.

and what easier way to do that than to get the teacher out of class? imagine this scenario:

you are sitting through a boring, brain-straining maths lesson on equations of circles, and you really feel like taking a bite out of that big gigantic sandwich that you brought back from recess, fortunately not getting caught by any prefects.

so what the IRHC does is it comes up with an excuse to give you the Immediate Relief time. so in this case, we would probably rush into class and tell the teacher that superman wants to see him (if you subscribe to the Amateur membership), and get the prefects to go for an SL meeting.

and that's only the lowest form of membership! as the membership upgrades, which would obviously cost you more, the guarantee of the Immediate Relief attempt working gets higher and higher, and the likely time that the teacher will be away get longer and longer!

so cool right?

lol anw on another note im running out of stuff to blog about so if my posts are getting really corny and crappy pls give me some time to think of other stuff thankyou.

a great use of curriculum time

ok this was what i was doing during chinese lesson...

and if you really dont understand...
this is what it means:
it means that jingzhuzhechi, jingmozhehei means that if you are close to something black and shittish, you get black. so the stickman in the picture with a very big stomache is someone prominent in ri who takes care of all our SAFETY.
so the fox kena influenced to get black too lor!

Quote of the Day

Peng has managed to come up with an amazingly WRONG sounding quote today. Yay. This is what happened:

Dillon: Can you give me some of the egg? (points at tofu thingy on my plate)
Me (to Dillon): I'm sure that's called egg lah; if that's called egg then that's called what? (pointing at white sauce on Dillon's plate) Sperm ah?
Me: *plonks a bit of the tofu thingy on Dillon's plate*
Peng (to Dillon): Eh can I have some of your sperm?

GOOD JOB PENG!

one of those days

see lah, this is just one of those days, one of those days, where i forget what i was supposed to blog about. oh *sigh* i guess i shall just have to blog about my day...

ok fine i noe today was supposed to be the revival of the peng quotes, but sorry lah i just wasnt in the mood. how can u be in the mood to take down quotes when you just completed an amazing comeback from two-nil down during pe to win with a hattrick? outstanding!

aiyah today was a damn screwd up day with pirated sperms and m-olestruation. haha but i damn sian lah ok pls our sftball b team just got whacked by the J1s...sian....

sorry really really crap post today lah sry sry dao qian ok byebye

i am pleased to announce the return by popular demand of yougotpenged's quotes section.

*cheers*

yes yes, please control your urge to jump up and down on the sofa in excitement. we dont want to get hauled to court by you claiming that we got you grounded.

the quotes section is bigger and better, with a more stringent grading system to churn out only the best quotes by members of the 3P classroom. and better, because we realise that peng is not the only cockster in 3P!

YES we will be featuring EVERYBODY from 3P!

*cheers*

ok FINE, in response to all the constructive criticism that we have been getting for yougotpenged, i shall post something USEFUL and CONSTRUCTIVE for once.

remember how two weeks ago i predicted an arsenal victory and it really did happen? well, here i am again with my top tips for the top games going on in the UEFA Champions League! woohoo! hail me the mysterious punter they should like feature me under a special column in the New Paper called like Slau's Sanctum or something...

OK anyway back to the point:

ARSENAL carry a one-goal lead back to highbury against REAL MADRID. ok keep in mind that this is an AWAY GOAL, so real have to win by TWO to win. draw, and they're out, simple as that.

arsenal's home form had been solid this year, solid as in SOLID AS A ROCK! and they're going to (high) BURY real under a torrent of amazing attacking prowess when they clash in a condemned match that arsenal is going to take by the scruff of the neck and OWN it.

another thing, ronaldo has been real's lucky charm. seriously, why hasnt he been scoring? the reason is simple yet seemingly idiotic: he obviously isnt wagging his index finger when he scores!

in football there is a god called the Footy Father, who looks down upon all those skilful and dedicated to the beautiful game.

(ok SCREW IT i dun have so much time to upload and look at blogger screw itself up)

anyway if you dun celebrate the way the Footy Father has decreed you to, then you dun score simple as that. which is why ronaldo cant score.

and why isnt the rest of the team of real performing? simple! they're all androids!

why do you think perez resigned? cos he was an android! and the real manager, going only by the code name Esoj Ohniruom, decided to destroy him cos he was malfunctioning :D simply believable innit?

and the next game, CHELSEA take on BARCELONA in a clash at the nou camp where barca take a one goal lead back to their home ground.

alright analysing the situation barca are in a better situation that arsenal because even if they lose by one goal they will go thru on away goals since they have two from the game at stamford bridge.

and based on the tykoness of barca (they won 3-2 at deportivo) and the laclustreness of chelsea (2-1 winners only against west brom anyone?) anyone would be predicting a barca win.

any why not? to tell you the truth my friend met the second cousin twice removed of frank lampard and he told my friend that frank really isnt injured, but he just wants to give the match a miss cos if he gets kicked out of his second straight champs league he's going to cry all the way to his mommy.

and he has this fear, especially after the sven goran eriksson and the fake sheik incident, that his mommy is actually a fake mommy too! yah so lampard is out, morale is low, and how can u trust maniche when he says morale is high. he hasnt even played a bloogy champs league match!

so arsenal and barca to go thru to the next round.

anyway, other results:

juventus to beat werder bremen 2-0 at home and go thru
liverpool to beat benfica 1-0, qualify on penalties.

and thats basically all i can remember off hand. distrust me at your own peril MWAHAHAH!

Your element is Water. You have a calm aura around you and are in tune with the world around. You observe it but rarely interfere. Because of your shy and timid nature you will not have so many friends in your life. But then again, large crowds aren't your thing anyway. You are comfortable on your own and are reserved to others who you don't know or know very little of. You know everyone out there does not want to be your friend, and knowing that is good. However, people who don't know you that well thinks that you are cold and distant since you don't want to talk to them. Although you mean no harm, you can't always be perfectly understood in the world. No one can. Life in general are you quite serene with even if there are some things you don't like. Your love-life is not so full of boys/girls, but if you flirted more with the ones you were interested in I'm sure something would happen. The hobbies you choose are calmer ones, you are no party girl that likes to drink and make-out with three or more guys/girls in one night. Reading a book or swimming is more your thing.

this proves how marvellously accurate the quizzes on quzzila are! i mean, it describes me PERFECTLY!

obviously i have a calm aura around me. i mean i can actually SLEEP during tests! if that's not calm den your meaning of it obviously differs from mine. or maybe it could be because of its pronunciation which is similiar to smething else on your mind...

i am obviously at one with the world. that's why i can hear oberon and titania making love in their little mushroom home for the fairies.

i also dun have many friends thats why i always do projects with the same people.

and i hate large crowds which is why i sit in the peicai bench during src finals to support cat hi.

obviously people dowan to be friends with me later i kena catch their big head viruses.

and i dun talk either. i only shout.

i also dun flirt at all! obviously right, im so busy doing projects for people and studying for tests that i have no time to think of cute girls in skimpy outfits waiting to partay.

my hobby is looking at ants carry food. oh they are SO cute!

Oh but im no party girl. im a party GUY!

yupyup i like to read books. im a mugger frog whee!

in short what this quiz is trying to say is that im unfortunately suicidal.

holidays? what holidays?

ok, since we have so much homework to do today, i suggest some pre-homework meditation today. ok fine i guess that won't help very much, and so i shall suggest some reasons to get past these assignments. and trust me, these will TOTALLY convince your teacher.

forget about the reasons like competitions. those are under another section where you have to create false circumstances to substantiate your claim. the reasons i am about to propose are totally fool proof, and cannot be proven wrong.

1) my mom hates me doing homework! (moms will generally side their children, and scold them after the teacher is gone. if shes not then too bad for you haha.)
2) my dad hates me doing homework! (same thing)
3) my dog ate my worksheets and died and we threw him into the atlantic ocean. (make sure you include the last part so the teacher cant check up on it, and pretend to cry too! den she'll send you to the counsellor to slack!)
4) it got too wet! (singapore's humid, the water condenses on your worksheet. helps if you use this on a non-science teacher.)
5) superman stole it. (double negative. superman isnt real, superman isnt bad. the false cancels out haha! its true!)
6) i gave it to the rep! (sabo him/her. and keep insisting that you did so the teacher will give up somemore time cos she/he got nothing else he/she can do.)
7) it melted! (singapore's hot.)
8) you were watching soccer! (implying that he/she had no time to mark your worksheets, so you had no time to do yours either.)
9) go to hell lah. (if they're in hell, they cant collect your wrksheets right?)
and
10) i didnt bring it. (totally believable, and much better than the previous nine!)

im not really very into debates, but yichao made me rmbr this particular motion that ri had to propose or oppose i cant rmbr some time back, and it was (wtf) that teletubbies were better than powerpuff girls...lol...

anyway ive decided to try my hand at it, especially since i watch enough tv to noe at least the basics abt these two groups of characters. and so, here would be my speech for the debate:














(oh did i mention that ziyao did something on why superman would defeat batman in a fight last year? haha i should try that one sometime)

ok, fine, i suppose that the motion meant that teletubbies would defeat the powerpuff girls in a fight, but i unfortunately think that they would in fact get owned by the powerpuff girls. why? three reasons:

they're cuter than the powerpuff girls
they have televisions in their stomachs
they are plain stoopid

ok so what does cuteness have to do with this? everything, in fact. you look at jorel, he's so cute (that's why he has 5 girlfriends) and he cant fight! den u look at peng...he's even cuter cos of his big head, and he also cant fight! den u look at ding...yucks...not cute...but can fight sia.

so obviously when x=cuteness, y=cannot fight for nuts.

also teletubbies have televisions in their stomachs, so how can u expect them to fight? i mean it would be like peng fighting ding at full speed lah wth. powerpuff girls can sit and watch them lumber around trying to their like furry little paws with no claws (hey rhymes!) around their throats and what, strangle them? PLS this is children entertainment!

and are u trying to say that the teletubbies are good enough to beat the PPG when even mojo jojo cant do it? PSHAW!

and i rmbr watching this teletubby episode (YES ok i did watch it sometimes) when tinky winky went chasing lala all over the place just cos she stole his purple watever it was...

wah lau...seriously lah hasnt he heard of stealing her ball and going for a trade? LOL and the constant staring at the baby sun wouldnt have done anything good for their eyes as well, so i bet they wouldnt see the powerpuff girls for miles until they're right in front of their faces and just nicely poised to smach their heads off.

ok! thats all byebye!

ok, so here's another club that takes care of the enjoyment of students in raffles institution, and its called the IRHC (Immediate Relief and Help Club).

so what does the IRHC do? some of you might equate immediate relief with first aid and bandages, and breathing into other peoples' mouths, but in this case this is NOT what we mean!

so what do we mean by immediate relief? well, in class we require a lot more than listening to lessons and copying stuff from the board and saboing classmates (although that would be more fun than the other two).

sometimes what we need is just a little time to ourselves to whip out our handphones, play a few games, and throw one or two knives to relieve the stress of having to suffer the anomosity of trick questions, wrong sf specifications, and unanswerable answers.

and what easier way to do that than to get the teacher out of class? imagine this scenario:

you are sitting through a boring, brain-straining maths lesson on equations of circles, and you really feel like taking a bite out of that big gigantic sandwich that you brought back from recess, fortunately not getting caught by any prefects.

so what the IRHC does is it comes up with an excuse to give you the Immediate Relief time. so in this case, we would probably rush into class and tell the teacher that superman wants to see him (if you subscribe to the Amateur membership), and get the prefects to go for an SL meeting.

and that's only the lowest form of membership! as the membership upgrades, which would obviously cost you more, the guarantee of the Immediate Relief attempt working gets higher and higher, and the likely time that the teacher will be away get longer and longer!

so cool right?

lol anw on another note im running out of stuff to blog about so if my posts are getting really corny and crappy pls give me some time to think of other stuff thankyou.

a great use of curriculum time

ok this was what i was doing during chinese lesson...

and if you really dont understand...
this is what it means:
it means that jingzhuzhechi, jingmozhehei means that if you are close to something black and shittish, you get black. so the stickman in the picture with a very big stomache is someone prominent in ri who takes care of all our SAFETY.
so the fox kena influenced to get black too lor!

Quote of the Day

Peng has managed to come up with an amazingly WRONG sounding quote today. Yay. This is what happened:

Dillon: Can you give me some of the egg? (points at tofu thingy on my plate)
Me (to Dillon): I'm sure that's called egg lah; if that's called egg then that's called what? (pointing at white sauce on Dillon's plate) Sperm ah?
Me: *plonks a bit of the tofu thingy on Dillon's plate*
Peng (to Dillon): Eh can I have some of your sperm?

GOOD JOB PENG!

one of those days

see lah, this is just one of those days, one of those days, where i forget what i was supposed to blog about. oh *sigh* i guess i shall just have to blog about my day...

ok fine i noe today was supposed to be the revival of the peng quotes, but sorry lah i just wasnt in the mood. how can u be in the mood to take down quotes when you just completed an amazing comeback from two-nil down during pe to win with a hattrick? outstanding!

aiyah today was a damn screwd up day with pirated sperms and m-olestruation. haha but i damn sian lah ok pls our sftball b team just got whacked by the J1s...sian....

sorry really really crap post today lah sry sry dao qian ok byebye

i am pleased to announce the return by popular demand of yougotpenged's quotes section.

*cheers*

yes yes, please control your urge to jump up and down on the sofa in excitement. we dont want to get hauled to court by you claiming that we got you grounded.

the quotes section is bigger and better, with a more stringent grading system to churn out only the best quotes by members of the 3P classroom. and better, because we realise that peng is not the only cockster in 3P!

YES we will be featuring EVERYBODY from 3P!

*cheers*

ok FINE, in response to all the constructive criticism that we have been getting for yougotpenged, i shall post something USEFUL and CONSTRUCTIVE for once.

remember how two weeks ago i predicted an arsenal victory and it really did happen? well, here i am again with my top tips for the top games going on in the UEFA Champions League! woohoo! hail me the mysterious punter they should like feature me under a special column in the New Paper called like Slau's Sanctum or something...

OK anyway back to the point:

ARSENAL carry a one-goal lead back to highbury against REAL MADRID. ok keep in mind that this is an AWAY GOAL, so real have to win by TWO to win. draw, and they're out, simple as that.

arsenal's home form had been solid this year, solid as in SOLID AS A ROCK! and they're going to (high) BURY real under a torrent of amazing attacking prowess when they clash in a condemned match that arsenal is going to take by the scruff of the neck and OWN it.

another thing, ronaldo has been real's lucky charm. seriously, why hasnt he been scoring? the reason is simple yet seemingly idiotic: he obviously isnt wagging his index finger when he scores!

in football there is a god called the Footy Father, who looks down upon all those skilful and dedicated to the beautiful game.

(ok SCREW IT i dun have so much time to upload and look at blogger screw itself up)

anyway if you dun celebrate the way the Footy Father has decreed you to, then you dun score simple as that. which is why ronaldo cant score.

and why isnt the rest of the team of real performing? simple! they're all androids!

why do you think perez resigned? cos he was an android! and the real manager, going only by the code name Esoj Ohniruom, decided to destroy him cos he was malfunctioning :D simply believable innit?

and the next game, CHELSEA take on BARCELONA in a clash at the nou camp where barca take a one goal lead back to their home ground.

alright analysing the situation barca are in a better situation that arsenal because even if they lose by one goal they will go thru on away goals since they have two from the game at stamford bridge.

and based on the tykoness of barca (they won 3-2 at deportivo) and the laclustreness of chelsea (2-1 winners only against west brom anyone?) anyone would be predicting a barca win.

any why not? to tell you the truth my friend met the second cousin twice removed of frank lampard and he told my friend that frank really isnt injured, but he just wants to give the match a miss cos if he gets kicked out of his second straight champs league he's going to cry all the way to his mommy.

and he has this fear, especially after the sven goran eriksson and the fake sheik incident, that his mommy is actually a fake mommy too! yah so lampard is out, morale is low, and how can u trust maniche when he says morale is high. he hasnt even played a bloogy champs league match!

so arsenal and barca to go thru to the next round.

anyway, other results:

juventus to beat werder bremen 2-0 at home and go thru
liverpool to beat benfica 1-0, qualify on penalties.

and thats basically all i can remember off hand. distrust me at your own peril MWAHAHAH!

Your element is Water. You have a calm aura around you and are in tune with the world around. You observe it but rarely interfere. Because of your shy and timid nature you will not have so many friends in your life. But then again, large crowds aren't your thing anyway. You are comfortable on your own and are reserved to others who you don't know or know very little of. You know everyone out there does not want to be your friend, and knowing that is good. However, people who don't know you that well thinks that you are cold and distant since you don't want to talk to them. Although you mean no harm, you can't always be perfectly understood in the world. No one can. Life in general are you quite serene with even if there are some things you don't like. Your love-life is not so full of boys/girls, but if you flirted more with the ones you were interested in I'm sure something would happen. The hobbies you choose are calmer ones, you are no party girl that likes to drink and make-out with three or more guys/girls in one night. Reading a book or swimming is more your thing.

this proves how marvellously accurate the quizzes on quzzila are! i mean, it describes me PERFECTLY!

obviously i have a calm aura around me. i mean i can actually SLEEP during tests! if that's not calm den your meaning of it obviously differs from mine. or maybe it could be because of its pronunciation which is similiar to smething else on your mind...

i am obviously at one with the world. that's why i can hear oberon and titania making love in their little mushroom home for the fairies.

i also dun have many friends thats why i always do projects with the same people.

and i hate large crowds which is why i sit in the peicai bench during src finals to support cat hi.

obviously people dowan to be friends with me later i kena catch their big head viruses.

and i dun talk either. i only shout.

i also dun flirt at all! obviously right, im so busy doing projects for people and studying for tests that i have no time to think of cute girls in skimpy outfits waiting to partay.

my hobby is looking at ants carry food. oh they are SO cute!

Oh but im no party girl. im a party GUY!

yupyup i like to read books. im a mugger frog whee!

in short what this quiz is trying to say is that im unfortunately suicidal.