How to get gurlxx part 4.

Seence you have rad the previus chee putts, you now noe how to get gurlxx.

But nao I teach you the 4th part, for advanced noveeces.

numbr 1) Join a sports CCA, and then act cool and sey, Oh, I gotx this training, and its damn damn tuff, liek pt need to run 30 rounds around the track, then that's why I so pro and can take everything! Ya, then dey get all damn impressed and say, wah so proz, damn tough man! as tough as life damn tough. So let me give you all my money! Ok maybe not until that part.

numbr 2) avoid most SOCs like maths soc, astronomy soc, whatever and whatsoever. Also avoid performing artx cca, unless u want to impress the gurlxx in those cca, like drama queens or those who know how to play a flute very good (hint hint hint hint hint hint), or those who know how to blow a trumpet very good ( =) =) =)), or those who know how to play with plasticine or make squeeze dolls very good. Yup yup yup, so join a sports cca k k k ?

numbr 3) You nid to get gd results, or if you cannot get gd results, you nid to get super lousy shit results. Then if you get gd results, after you joint the sports cca, you can sey, wah, I damn pro shit, even with so much training my results still damn good. I smart + pro. So please give me all your lurve and such nao nao nao! Then if you cannot make it for results, then pretend and say, wah shit, training damn tough, no time for results, coz last week I went for that international meet and no time for homework. Ya, so mus distingueeish yourself k k.

numbr 4) You mus know veri good pick up lines. Not pick up skirt that kind of pick up lines, but really good onez. Ask me for help next time, I got alot and always work one. Tried and tested. Thx you thx you.

And this is the end for advanced beginnesrs. Afterwards I go post one for prox, but then you mus 拜我为师。

他妈的 you guys suck wth.

But you guys rock. wth.

And I know I damn hot damn handsome you guys cannot help it but to use waterballoon make me cooler right. Coz if not global warming too much you guys also cmi. =P

Hahaha,... we should have this kind of class bonding more often. But change target plx plx plx. =)

HAPPIIIII BIRTHDAEEEE SEETOWXXX

whoo hoo happy birthday seetow!

first the wasabi and chili sauce cake, then the water bombs, then the water bomb on peng (which i sadly wasnt around).

yay!

Happy Birthday Seetow!

Here's wishing our dear Seetow a happy, happy 17th birthday!

One year ago you could start contributing to Singapore's birth rate.
Next year you can do it legally (ie within wedlock)!

Anyway!

Here's hoping all of you enjoyed Seetow's birthday celebration.

Of course, it's hoping all of you enjoyed it.
I don't actually know if you did.
Because I was not there.

Why couldn't you have waited DDD:

naow.

BACK TO OUR LIVES/THEATRE STUDIES PLAY JOURNALS/GENERAL PAPER ASSIGNMENTS/HISTORY ESSAYS/MATH MUGGINS!

对面的女孩看过来,看过来,看过来...

NOT CALLING YOU LAR!!

Hao to get your gurlxxx part chee!

ehheh ehheh.

Nao after you've read the first too (plus gan's translation of peng (pro) english into normal inglish), thes is part chree for you! Like, numbr xxx (the third x, so third x la, stupid)

numbr y+x+1) Nao, yuu must learn to b farny. As funny as me. Which is damn hard to be but, I noe you can do it sooner or later. Don't kopy jokes off the website, because you'll be likely to find porn on it. Becoz internet for porn wad, stupid shit. Then the gurlxx get very turned off by porno jokes. Becoz not funny.

Ya, so must come up with those on the spot ones. Like what I do! And itz itz veri veri effactive. No joke. I mean, yes, got joke la, then its effagtive, but i mean no joke for that. Ya. Ok, then you must not laugh ok, unless dey laugh. if not you lok veri stopid. as stopid as slau that kind of stopid. Ya.

numbr x+y+2) Nao uu need to learn how to sing. Preferably learn from someone whos bettar than you. Like slau. Or someone's who's better's than slau. Like Peng. Ya, then again you can serenade and lemonade and orangenade and licksucknade and etc etc etc. So very fun. Yup yup. Plus you'll get a veri good voice in no time when talking normallee.

numbr x+y+3) Aftar that, then you need to learn hao to dance. Like do the bobochacha, or the mangotango, or the waltz disney. Ya, these kinds of dances. Also you should know how to boogeewoogee on the spot, then its veri veri coolios liek me. You saw how pro I was. So, ya, like me. You can always come to me for help. Just give me all your money.

numbr x+y+4) Then lastly, you nid to dress good and cool! I noe la, RJ uniform all damn ugly, but then that's becoz you ugly only. If you're like me, hot sexy cool handsome etc etc, then you'll look gd in the rj uniform. So sorri la, please refer bak to part too or part one to know hao to look good and look like me. Sorri no help here.

piss out. =)

a little rhyme

hi! here's a little rhyme that tells you more about hmmm... something...

my stick is long and hard
and a little curved at the tip!
its also a little bendy,
and holey at the nip!

my balls are small and round
and as porous as can be!
they're also rather hollow
and when whacked they just fly free!

hehehehe
i'm talking about floorball =)

How to get girls the Peng way.

Peng, your language is abominable.

Thus I will try to sort it out and post it in readable, Academic English, taking out all the opinions and phrasing the facts straight, so that the rest of the class knows what you're talking about.

The opportunity cost of this is rewriting my Econs essay, but, oh well, Sowden! :D

---
---

Now, let me tell you how to get your girl!

1) Don't swear in front of them. This upsets their sensibilities. Putting Peng in front of them will do the same thing - do not in any way appear to contribute to the fact of Peng's existence - for example, do not invite him to a party and then tell everyone that you invited him to the party - or you will be blamed when Peng upsets their sensibilities.

2) Try working out. Do something active, physical, lift weights, juggle dumbbells, work on those chin-ups. It is important to remember that where the weights are concerned, Titus is your king (one... two... three... four... five... ... sexy.). Physical work contributes to muscle development and testosterone production, which makes you especially attractive when girls are ovulating.

3) Have nice hair. Although this is subjective, suffice to say afros aren't always the way to go. Also, try not to get something that makes your head look bigger than it already is, as bigheaded people are intimidating and may upset sensibilities, etc, etc, of the fairer sex. Some people like adding highlights into their hair to accentuate their styles; personally, I prefer this to dyeing, which is obnoxious in the extreme.

4) Learn how to play an instrument. This applies especially if you can't do 2) (although we have people like Hiok who can do both, possibly at the same time, and probably look pretty cool doing it too D:). A good instrument to learn is the guitar, which is pretty portable or can always be borrowed from some other wannabe wooer. Drat, that wasn't very academic, was it? Oh well, it stays; it's alliteration. Do not, however, go to instruments like the flute and violin. The bamboo flute was all very good for Chinese 秀才, but, you know, it lacks a certain je ne sais quoi in the field of Masculinity. The band flutes make lovely music, but once again are more a girl's domain. The violin makes nice sounds accompanied but can be annoying alone. Music soothes and impresses at the same time, and is good for setting the mood with which you would like to approach or talk to a girl or group of girls.

5) Just learn from me. No, serious, ask Moose, Leo and Peng Seng how many different girls they've caught me with over the past week; walking home, or in KFC, or together in the canteen :D

6) Steer clear of the gossipy type. I cannot stress this enough. They will make you emo and write F-words on your MSN nick.

taking the piss out of Peng,

How to get gurlxx part 4.

Seence you have rad the previus chee putts, you now noe how to get gurlxx.

But nao I teach you the 4th part, for advanced noveeces.

numbr 1) Join a sports CCA, and then act cool and sey, Oh, I gotx this training, and its damn damn tuff, liek pt need to run 30 rounds around the track, then that's why I so pro and can take everything! Ya, then dey get all damn impressed and say, wah so proz, damn tough man! as tough as life damn tough. So let me give you all my money! Ok maybe not until that part.

numbr 2) avoid most SOCs like maths soc, astronomy soc, whatever and whatsoever. Also avoid performing artx cca, unless u want to impress the gurlxx in those cca, like drama queens or those who know how to play a flute very good (hint hint hint hint hint hint), or those who know how to blow a trumpet very good ( =) =) =)), or those who know how to play with plasticine or make squeeze dolls very good. Yup yup yup, so join a sports cca k k k ?

numbr 3) You nid to get gd results, or if you cannot get gd results, you nid to get super lousy shit results. Then if you get gd results, after you joint the sports cca, you can sey, wah, I damn pro shit, even with so much training my results still damn good. I smart + pro. So please give me all your lurve and such nao nao nao! Then if you cannot make it for results, then pretend and say, wah shit, training damn tough, no time for results, coz last week I went for that international meet and no time for homework. Ya, so mus distingueeish yourself k k.

numbr 4) You mus know veri good pick up lines. Not pick up skirt that kind of pick up lines, but really good onez. Ask me for help next time, I got alot and always work one. Tried and tested. Thx you thx you.

And this is the end for advanced beginnesrs. Afterwards I go post one for prox, but then you mus 拜我为师。

他妈的 you guys suck wth.

But you guys rock. wth.

And I know I damn hot damn handsome you guys cannot help it but to use waterballoon make me cooler right. Coz if not global warming too much you guys also cmi. =P

Hahaha,... we should have this kind of class bonding more often. But change target plx plx plx. =)

HAPPIIIII BIRTHDAEEEE SEETOWXXX

whoo hoo happy birthday seetow!

first the wasabi and chili sauce cake, then the water bombs, then the water bomb on peng (which i sadly wasnt around).

yay!

Happy Birthday Seetow!

Here's wishing our dear Seetow a happy, happy 17th birthday!

One year ago you could start contributing to Singapore's birth rate.
Next year you can do it legally (ie within wedlock)!

Anyway!

Here's hoping all of you enjoyed Seetow's birthday celebration.

Of course, it's hoping all of you enjoyed it.
I don't actually know if you did.
Because I was not there.

Why couldn't you have waited DDD:

naow.

BACK TO OUR LIVES/THEATRE STUDIES PLAY JOURNALS/GENERAL PAPER ASSIGNMENTS/HISTORY ESSAYS/MATH MUGGINS!

对面的女孩看过来,看过来,看过来...

NOT CALLING YOU LAR!!

Hao to get your gurlxxx part chee!

ehheh ehheh.

Nao after you've read the first too (plus gan's translation of peng (pro) english into normal inglish), thes is part chree for you! Like, numbr xxx (the third x, so third x la, stupid)

numbr y+x+1) Nao, yuu must learn to b farny. As funny as me. Which is damn hard to be but, I noe you can do it sooner or later. Don't kopy jokes off the website, because you'll be likely to find porn on it. Becoz internet for porn wad, stupid shit. Then the gurlxx get very turned off by porno jokes. Becoz not funny.

Ya, so must come up with those on the spot ones. Like what I do! And itz itz veri veri effactive. No joke. I mean, yes, got joke la, then its effagtive, but i mean no joke for that. Ya. Ok, then you must not laugh ok, unless dey laugh. if not you lok veri stopid. as stopid as slau that kind of stopid. Ya.

numbr x+y+2) Nao uu need to learn how to sing. Preferably learn from someone whos bettar than you. Like slau. Or someone's who's better's than slau. Like Peng. Ya, then again you can serenade and lemonade and orangenade and licksucknade and etc etc etc. So very fun. Yup yup. Plus you'll get a veri good voice in no time when talking normallee.

numbr x+y+3) Aftar that, then you need to learn hao to dance. Like do the bobochacha, or the mangotango, or the waltz disney. Ya, these kinds of dances. Also you should know how to boogeewoogee on the spot, then its veri veri coolios liek me. You saw how pro I was. So, ya, like me. You can always come to me for help. Just give me all your money.

numbr x+y+4) Then lastly, you nid to dress good and cool! I noe la, RJ uniform all damn ugly, but then that's becoz you ugly only. If you're like me, hot sexy cool handsome etc etc, then you'll look gd in the rj uniform. So sorri la, please refer bak to part too or part one to know hao to look good and look like me. Sorri no help here.

piss out. =)

a little rhyme

hi! here's a little rhyme that tells you more about hmmm... something...

my stick is long and hard
and a little curved at the tip!
its also a little bendy,
and holey at the nip!

my balls are small and round
and as porous as can be!
they're also rather hollow
and when whacked they just fly free!

hehehehe
i'm talking about floorball =)

How to get girls the Peng way.

Peng, your language is abominable.

Thus I will try to sort it out and post it in readable, Academic English, taking out all the opinions and phrasing the facts straight, so that the rest of the class knows what you're talking about.

The opportunity cost of this is rewriting my Econs essay, but, oh well, Sowden! :D

---
---

Now, let me tell you how to get your girl!

1) Don't swear in front of them. This upsets their sensibilities. Putting Peng in front of them will do the same thing - do not in any way appear to contribute to the fact of Peng's existence - for example, do not invite him to a party and then tell everyone that you invited him to the party - or you will be blamed when Peng upsets their sensibilities.

2) Try working out. Do something active, physical, lift weights, juggle dumbbells, work on those chin-ups. It is important to remember that where the weights are concerned, Titus is your king (one... two... three... four... five... ... sexy.). Physical work contributes to muscle development and testosterone production, which makes you especially attractive when girls are ovulating.

3) Have nice hair. Although this is subjective, suffice to say afros aren't always the way to go. Also, try not to get something that makes your head look bigger than it already is, as bigheaded people are intimidating and may upset sensibilities, etc, etc, of the fairer sex. Some people like adding highlights into their hair to accentuate their styles; personally, I prefer this to dyeing, which is obnoxious in the extreme.

4) Learn how to play an instrument. This applies especially if you can't do 2) (although we have people like Hiok who can do both, possibly at the same time, and probably look pretty cool doing it too D:). A good instrument to learn is the guitar, which is pretty portable or can always be borrowed from some other wannabe wooer. Drat, that wasn't very academic, was it? Oh well, it stays; it's alliteration. Do not, however, go to instruments like the flute and violin. The bamboo flute was all very good for Chinese 秀才, but, you know, it lacks a certain je ne sais quoi in the field of Masculinity. The band flutes make lovely music, but once again are more a girl's domain. The violin makes nice sounds accompanied but can be annoying alone. Music soothes and impresses at the same time, and is good for setting the mood with which you would like to approach or talk to a girl or group of girls.

5) Just learn from me. No, serious, ask Moose, Leo and Peng Seng how many different girls they've caught me with over the past week; walking home, or in KFC, or together in the canteen :D

6) Steer clear of the gossipy type. I cannot stress this enough. They will make you emo and write F-words on your MSN nick.

taking the piss out of Peng,